In TEN TIMES HAPPIER, Owen O’Kane reveals how to choose new, healthier perspectives and ditch harmful patterns in the 10 key areas we all overthink about or manage poorly, including:
• the past
• our minds
• other people
• worry
• our behaviours
• the future
Using the latest evidence-based tools and techniques from across a range of therapies including CBT, mindfulness and interpersonal therapy, Owen provides empowering solutions to managing what keeps you stuck so you can move forward.
Want a down-to-earth guide from a professional on HOW you can become happier, minus the fairy dust?
I am always found with my head in a book craving the joy of
the characters and pure escapism to whisk me away from day to day life. Today I
am reviewing a completely different book which I read in the hope that rather
than finding a fictional character’s happiness I may find a glimmer of my own
in Ten Times Happier by Owen O’Kane.
I have read so many books in the past year on, happiness,
positive thinking and self help and if I am completely honest with you I think
the money back in my pocket would have been more help than the words that were
inside, I found them condescending and unhelpful and a little whimsical.
When I read the blurb for Ten Times Happier it sounded
promising and the mention of “ Do you want a down to earth guide from a
professional on how you can be happier
minus the fairy dust?” won me over even if there was still a part of me
believing that this was going to be another waste of my time.
Really I could just review this book as simply as THANK YOU
to Owen O’Kane and I am not too proud to say that I had a little weep at a
couple of points reading this book and a big snotty one when finishing it at
then end as it felt like for the first time in two and a half years some one
actually GOT me and listened to me without evening having to meet me or talk!
I lost my husband to Suicide in February 2019, we walked
the river twice a day to try and find his body which prolonged the funeral and
the coroners court and the grieving process, like him I also tried to seek help
in my feelings later that year but there was a long waiting list and then Covid
hit so I have never received help. I turned to my old faithful friend reading
to try and find help amongst the pages and all the books later I finally found
this book that has felt like it understood me. No it isn’t a magic cure but it
is a little light that makes you see things differently and gives you ways of
coping and processing different things.
We all struggle with many different things that cause
unhappiness from relationships, money, anxiety and depression, addiction, grief
and so on. Some chapters you will resonate with more than others, I have a
couple that literally felt like they were written for me and I was sitting
there nodding away as each thing he mentioned was so true. Chapter 10 which is
about being fixated on uncertainty concerning the future was one I will
continually go back to. I can not tell you the last time I was truly happy and
comfortable or when I last laughed properly. I find going to parties or
gatherings with friends and family particularly overwhelming and it makes me
fell like I don’t belong anymore and this was also something that one of his cases
he mentioned felt and it was a light relief to know that it isn’t just me who
feels like this. “I’m not sure I will ever laugh properly again” is what the
person in question said and that hit hard as I have had this thought so often.
Another part that sticks in my mind is that of living simply
and living for the day and being content with what we have as we are not in
control of the future so as much as we can plan all we like things will always
come up that can put the plan of course so at least if you can enjoy today you
are not missing out on your future,
The way in which the author writes the book is literally
like you are sitting there in a room with him speaking to you his voices flowing
through the pages with just his attention and focus on you. I read this on
kindle but I am that blown away by this book and have found it so helpful I am
going to get the audio to listen to on my way to work in the mornings when I am
having one of those I can’t face the world today moments and also a paperback
to post it note all the pages that I feel help me. Chapter 11 was another chapter
that resonated with me and I really wish that there was more help readily out
there because talking about traumatic situations is important in the road to
recovery rather than doing what myself and a lot of others do and jus have to
try and pack it away in a box to try and get through a “normal” day and yet
still relive the event every day as though it has only just happened. Unfortunately when a loved one dies other day to day struggles don't avoid you and the bills still come rolling in so we can't all pay for therapy so we have to just get on with it and so this little book I hope will help someone like it has felt like a listening and encouraging ear to me.
I would definitely whole heartedly recommend this book for
anyone who is looking for a little down to earth honest help to find that
little glisten of happiness again. I will read anything this man writes because
he has made me feel like there is a small chance of finding a little happiness once
again.
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