The Forgetting by Hannah Beckerman

 

When Anna Bradshaw wakes up in a hospital bed in London, she remembers nothing, not even her loving husband, Stephen. The doctors say her amnesia is to be expected, but Anna feels cut adrift from her entire life.

In Bristol, Livvy Nicholson is newly married to Dominic and eager to get back to work after six months’ maternity leave. But when Dominic’s estranged mother appears, making a series of unnerving claims, Livvy is sucked into a version of herself she doesn’t recognise.

A hundred miles apart, both women feel trapped and disorientated, and their stories are about to collide. Can they uncover the secret that connects them and reconstruct their fractured lives?

Hannah Beckerman is an author who delivers remarkable storylines every time and usually I need a whole box of tissues to get through a novel of hers but for her new release The Forgetting you can cast the tissues aside because this one is not going to make you cry its going to lure you in and play with your mind!

This novel is told using short sharp chapters that alternate between Anna Bradshaw and Livvy Nicholson as the chapters switch quickly we are kept bouncing on our toes as we begin to know each of these women.

Anna has been in a horrific car accident that has left her with amnesia, waking up to find a man she doesn’t know next to her, her husband Stephen. Anna is going to have to rely on Stephen to help her piece together her life before the accident in the hope that her memories will return.

New mum Livvy is adjusting to her new life as a mum to Leo and wide to her devoted and dependable husband Dominic but when his mum turns up unannounced there are things that seem amiss.

I don’t remember the last time I sat down to read an entire book in one evening but that is exactly what happened when I sat down to the first page of this book last night, before I knew it dinner had passed as the last page of this book was read, I was captivated to say the least. The short chapters made this a real breeze to read and kept my interest piqued as I learnt more about each of the women.

I had an idea about half way through what may lay ahead but I couldn’t quite work out how it was going to be revealed so I was desperate to keep reading and see how the author had created the twisty element and I was not disappointed.

This author has such a wonderful way with words and her novels really are crafted to perfection, I never find any flaws in her books and each and every one I still remember to vividly and this one, although very different from her previous books will also stick in my mind I am sure.

Novels that explore amnesia always intrigue me so I was gripped by Anna, waiting for her memories to return and discovering day to day difficulties sufferers face not even being safe enough to leave their house without forgetting where they live. The storyline covers a variation of topics alongside the amnesia including manipulation which was so easy to see as an outsider but shows how a victim can’t see what is right in front of them and how the manipulator manages to get into their head and their comments are like poison slowly spreading until they get the result they want.

This gets top marks from me and is certainly one I will be recommending.

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The Impossible Truths of Love by Hannah Beckerman

 

It is my stop on the blog tour for Hannah Beckerman's third novel The Impossible Truths of Love and I am going to be sharing my review on this accomplished and poignant read.

When Nell’s father makes a deathbed declaration that hints at a long-held secret, it reignites feelings of isolation that have plagued her for years. Her suspicions about the family’s past only deepen when her mother, Annie, who is losing her memories to dementia, starts making cryptic comments of her own.

Thirty-five years earlier, Annie’s life was upended by a series of traumas—one shock after another that she buried deep in her heart. The decisions she made at the time were motivated by love, but she knew even then that nobody could ever understand—let alone forgive—what she did.

As the two women’s stories unravel, a generation apart, Nell finally discovers the devastating truth about her mother’s past, and her own.

Hannah Beckerman is the author of two absolutely flawless and highly emotive novels both left a lasting impression on me. We have desperately long waits between her novels but they are truly worth waiting for.

The Impossible Truths of Love is Hannah’s third novel which begins with our main character Nell as she sits with her dad in the last hours of his life when he makes the declaration “I have always loved you even if you were never really ever mine to love”

In the weeks after the loss of her father and with her mum quickly becoming lost to dementia the time is ticking but Nell wants to find answers as to what her father’s last words to her could really mean.

This book explores the effects of grief and trauma on mental health and the impact deep rooted secrets have on shaping the lives of all involved because all secrets have a way of coming to light in the end and the longer they stay hidden the more damage they cause.

The book tells the story of both Nell and her mum, Annie so we get a bigger picture as we start to put the pieces of the story together looking for clues as to what secret is hidden in Nells childhood. As Annie tells her story there is so much honest, raw and painful emotion seeping through the pages, a mother who has had her heart broken to pieces in a devastating way and the author has raised awareness on this subject matter in such a tender and careful way as she always so masterfully does.

Hannah Beckerman has such a powerful emotive style of writing that really hits home every time I read her novels and they all feel so honest and believable like I am reading a life story and that is because she draws on day to day tragic events of loss that affect us all directly or indirectly in our life time which leaves us at our most vulnerable and every single emotion we feel she pours int the bucket loads into her storylines.

I didn’t like Nell’s sisters especially Claire and although the way in which they treat Nell is explained later on in the storyline and is proof of how secrets can destroy a relationship I still don’t feel that Nell deserved to be treated the way she did and I was so pleased she had a supportive boyfriend and long standing family friend to support her.

This is yet again another skilful written unpredictable storyline with so much depth, emotion and intrigue to make this a captivating and poignant read, so praise once again to Hannah Beckerman.

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If Only I Could Tell You by Hannah Beckerman.

Audrey's family has fallen apart. Her two grown-up daughters, Jess and Lily, are estranged, and her two teenage granddaughters have never been allowed to meet. A secret that echoes back thirty years has splintered the family in two, but is also the one thing keeping them connected.

As tensions reach breaking point, the irrevocable choice that one of them made all those years ago is about to surface. After years of secrets and silence, how can one broken family find their way back to each other?

Nearly five years ago I read The Dead Wife’s Handbook by Hannah Beckerman, an extraordinary debut that was flawless and so powerful that years on I still find myself recommending this book. I have been desperate for Hannah Beckerman to release another novel but now after reading her new release If Only I Could Tell You I can easily see why we have had a such a long wait for another book by her as this book has blown me away and the storyline is so intricately woven and full of such raw emotions it is perfection.

Jess has refused to have her sister Lily in any part of her life for the past 30 years after a situation occurred that left her unable to forgive Lily even after their mum Audrey’s attempts to get them to repair their broken relationship. Both Lily and Audrey are none the wiser as to what it is that Jess holds Lily responsible for but Audrey is desperate to bring her daughters back together.

The prologue introduces us to Jess and Lily and instantly creates intrigue and mystery reeling me in and I knew from this point I was going to be unable to put this book down, I wasn’t wrong!

As I made my way through each chapter which were told from the points of view of all three women, I found my mind jumping to all sorts of conclusions as to what on earth could have happened all those years ago to have such a devastating impact on Jess that has left her so emotionally charged that she couldn’t bear to have her sister around her.

I was expecting after reading the prologue to take a disliking to Lily but I found I was quite sympathetic to her character, it was clear she craved the love of her sister and found it so difficult not knowing what it was that her sister held against her. Jess was a character who I just wanted to hold, she seemed so cold and she had built up bridges to her heart not letting anyone in, even her relationship with her daughter was a distant one. Audrey was in such an impossible situation as a mother and especially with the problems she was facing, my heart went out to her and I was really hoping she would succeed in bringing her daughters together. 

When things began to unravel it was such an unexpected desperate situation, I felt so vulnerable and incredibly moved that my heart actually ached for these characters and I had to remind myself that this was a work of fiction because I was so invested in the characters and the storyline it all felt so incredibly raw and real and although I finished this book a couple of weeks ago now it really has left a mark on me.

The author has such a unique style to her writing that is so sensitive and tender. Her words are loaded with emotion, she creates storylines that will break your heart in two but she also builds so much intrigue and tension by keeping us in the dark with her unpredictable storylines, cleverly letting our minds roam down the wrong path before dramatically pulling us down another devastating path.

I cannot put into words the effect this book had on me, it seems wrong to say I enjoyed it but it is a book that will not leave my bookshelf and I will certainly be recommending this book far and wide. I can easily see this being my book of the year for 2019 it sure is going to be a difficult one to beat.

If Only I Could Tell You 

is available to pre-order now.

The release date is 21st February 2019.

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The Dead Wife's Handbook by Hannah Beckerman

Rachel, Max and their daughter Ellie had the perfect life - until the night Rachel's heart stopped beating. Now Max and Ellie are doing their best to adapt to life without Rachel, and just as her family can't forget her, Rachel can't quite let go of them either. Caught in a place between worlds, Rachel watches helplessly as she begins to fade from their lives. And when Max is persuaded by family and friends to start dating again, Rachel starts to understand that dying was just the beginning of her problems.

I was worried about reading this book at this moment in time, today is the day that a year ago I lost the most amazing woman in my life and so reading about the loss of a loved one from both sides was going to be rather challenging for me, but because I had heard so many people commenting on how great this book was I had to give it a try.

Rachel had a perfect life with her beautiful little family but her heart stopped beating and so she was taken from her family at such a young age. Leaving behind a loving husband Max and a gorgeous little girl Ellie is heart-breaking itself but Rachal gets to watch both Max and Ellie over time as they begin to come to terms with Rachels death and begin to move on, trouble is it isn’t only Max and Ellie who are struck by grief and needs to move on but so does Rachel.

I cannot believe that this is a debut book, the writing style is fantastic and flawless. I am always a little put off by books told from a dead characters point of view as usually they just feel either so unrealistic bordering on silly or very morbid, this wasn’t the case at all with this book if anything it felt a little too believable and really got me thinking how I would feel if I was Rachels character and so it started pulling at the heart strings.

What works well in this book is that it is divided up into the different stages of grief we go through Shock, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Testing and Acceptance and this works from both Rachel and from Max and Ellie’s points of views which feels strange thinking that someone who has passed can also grieve. As you can imagine just from the stages of grief alone this is an emotive read but for me it wasn’t so much about the emotion it was more about how thought provoking this book was, I constantly found myself putting myself in both Max and Rachels situation to see if I would feel or act the same.

Ellie is an adorable character and she is going through something no young girl should have to experience. Her character was very well written, there was no whiny babyish talk and she still had so much love and loyalty for her mum. I also loved Max but at times I was shocked by some of his actions.

This was a beautiful read that I thoroughly enjoyed and if this is just the beginning of this authors writing then I very much look forward to see what else this author has to offer.

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