Before You Say Goodbye by Sarah Gate

 

Autumn has found the love of her life.

Now she has to say goodbye, instead of hello to their forever.

When lonely author Autumn meets shy musician Bowie in New York, they fall head over heels and straight into bed.

Autumn has found her forever.

But not everyone gets their happily ever after. Bowie has just six months left to live.

And just like that, Autumn's entire life has been rewritten.

Embraced by his loving, unconventional family, Autumn returns with Bowie to England to live out the rest of his life by his side. But over the course of that summer, the decisions Autumn makes will help her move on, even after love and loss.

Decisions, it emerges, that were orchestrated by Bowie before they said goodbye.

Safe to say this book had me in a chokehold at times and I would definitely say check your trigger warnings before reading this book as it does cover grief, sexual abuse, family dynamics, suicidal episodes. So If your after a fluffy lighthearted romance you have come to the wrong place with this one as this book is emotionally charged and will shatter your heart in more ways than one.

This book surprised me because in the beginning when we first meet Autumn and Bluebell ( Bowie's sister ) I didn't instantly warm to them and I found each of them rather edgy and cold but the reasoning for this we do find out later in the book but I am so relieved I continued reading because from that cold start became a close knit support group around Bowie as we watched everyone struggle with his impending parting from this world and this really was heartbreaking to read. It really shines light on having to weigh up respecting someones wishes and doing what you want and what feels right in the moment, is there ever a right answer?

There was no sugarcoating around Bowie's health and there were disagreements and inexcusable mistakes made too which although I could see coming, still had me absolutely gobsmacked and intrigued to see how things would play out later in the story.

This is a family I really didn't want to leave as sharing these tender moments with them made me feel like I was enveloped in by them so I am relieved to see there is another book to read after this one where I can be reunited again and see how the family are doing.

Available to buy here